Expectation

Howdy, blogosphere!  Happy Wednesday (affectionately known as "Hump Day") to you! :)

I have always been very touched by music.  I don't know what it is about it, but from an early age, there have always been certain songs that just "got" me somehow.  I can remember how scared I was by Bill and Gloria Gaither's "Monster Song" was when I was little... and how much I wanted "Someday My Prince Will Come" to happen to me :).  If there's one church song that gets to me, there's a million (157 of which you will probably hear about eventually).  Well, this weekend, somewhere between Rome and Cave Springs (on one of the prettiest roads in the world), I heard a "new" song - specifically a couple of lines of one - that hit me like a ton of bricks:

"If faith can move the mountains
Let the mountains move
We come with expectationWaiting here for you "

-"Waiting Here For You" by Christy Nockels

expectation.  Expectation.  EXPECTATION?  Now, I pray, and I feel pretty good about my faith in the Lord and what He can do... right up until I need it.  Then, one of my most quoted verses of Scripture becomes "I believe, Lord, help my unbelief."  So why don't I expect the Lord to bless me?  Why is it so hard to let go of the control that I so desperately cling to like Linus clings to his blue blanket?  (The irony here is that my so-called "control" usually gets me into a bigger pickle than the ones you get at the fair.)  I was reminded of a story that our pastor has told a few times about a lady who had prayed for a particular need.  She asked God to intervene in the need, then she thanked God for answering her prayer.  Had He already answered it, right then and there?  No, but she expected and believed and knew that He was going to.

When you pray for rain, don't forget your umbrella.

When you ask for strength, get ready to flex your muscles.

When you request blessings, get your basket ready to collect the manna.

Pray.  Trust.  Have faith.  Believe.  Expect.

"Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost."  ~Romans 15:13



Too Much To Tell

Hello, blogosphere!  Greetings from the girl who never thought she'd ever be writing on a blog for the entire world wide web to see.  (The entire world?  Oh dear me.  I'm thinking 1.5 readers is probably much more realistic and much preferred!)  I get nervous about sharing my thoughts and feelings with other people... so why am I doing this?!?

Truth is, sometimes I'll have these conversations with myself (don't judge, I'm an only child :-)) and think "wow, that sounds like a blog!"  Said conversations usually happen when I'm doing one of two things:  driving and running.  True to form, I was pounding the pavement this evening (read: sweating like a pig) and, while reflecting on events of late, felt compelled to share them with you. 

Let me tell you, I'm one to worry.  Just ask Adam or my parents.  It's bad.  Really bad.  I worry about BIG things, little things, and things in between.  Not to mention, I've developed the habit of listening to just enough of the news to know that things are so tumultuous in our nation and our world... just enough to worry... and worry... and worry some more.  Stories of unemployment, lowered credit ratings, high gas prices, plummeting stock markets, and political unrest ... not to mention the status of the latest reality TV couple... are certainly enough to make this girl shake in her gladiators.  But you know, a wise woman whom I call Mama reminds me quite often to focus more on the good than the bad.  And let me tell you, on tonight's run, that's just what I did.

The summer of 2011 has been big, folks.  One might even say that it borders on GINORMOUS.  The Lord has answered so many prayers and blessed me in so many immeasurable ways.  On June 21st, I commemorated 20 years with Type I diabetes.  This is a blessing, you may ask?  Does a frog ribbit?  Do penguins wear tuxedos?  Those 20 years were celebated with healthy eyes, legs that can run, kidneys that work, and the support of family and friends that love me.  Not to mention a shiny pink insulin pump that gives me something remarkably similar to a normal life.  (The insulin pump has really changed my life... its pinkness is simply the Lord delighting me because he loves me so much!) 

My PINK pancreas in a box!

On July 2nd, a wonderful man asked me to marry him in a field full of beautiful sunflowers.  He is the answer to so many prayers - both mine and of those who love me.  He takes me at my best and at my worst and possesses so many qualities that I honestly never thought I'd find!  (By the way, folks, in case you were wondering... I said yes!)

(Photography by James Barker, www.jwbarkerphotography.com)



On July 13th, I celebrated a birthday... 21 years before, on July 13, 1990, I was saved by the Lord's grace.  I can never, ever begin to deserve or be worthy of His blessings on me... but He blesses me anyway!

As you can see, these were all pretty big personal victories, milestones, and huge blessings in my life.  They certainly weren't all of the goodness of the summer of 2011, though.  I saw souls saved; was privileged to teach precious children at VBS and Sunday School; visited the beach not once, but twice; ate sugar-free froyo at multiple locations... once even praline flavored; read more books than I can count on one hand; ran, sang, played, enjoyed nature... I could go on and on.  The truth is, despite the turmoil and fear and uncertainty surrounding us - and, no doubt, we as a people and a nation need to PRAY - I am reminded...

Could we with ink the ocean fill,

And were the skies of parchment made,

Were every stalk on earth a quill,

And every man a scribe by trade,

To write the love of God above,

Would drain the ocean dry.

Nor could the scroll contain the whole,

Though stretched from sky to sky.

~"The Love of God

His love for me and His love for you, my friends, is simply too much to tell.